Have you ever wondered why some of the best relationship experts appear to be single? They never quite seem to be cracking the romance game in their own personal lives and yet they give really, really good relationship advice that really helps the people they “counsel” in this manner. There are a number of reasons for this, which we’ll dive right down to the core of in today’s post.
A better perspective from the outside
This phenomenon actually transcends the often mystified world of relationships and permeates pretty much all areas of life where some kind of navigation is required. You can try and make what appears to be a far-flung association with reference to a chess match between two really good players. A player of equal strength observing from the sidelines will almost inevitably see a torrent of infinitely better moves, simply because a better perspective always seems to be the preserve of those looking on with a birds-eye view. Another reason is the concept of having a vested interest versus a passing interest.
Bringing things back to relationships in the particular instance, as the subject matter, if you’re “inside” a relationship then you’re one of the two primary subjects involved that means all the burdens of maintaining that relationship fall squarely on you. You kind of have to deal with issues as they come, whereas the expert who is looking in from the outside only has a passing interest. As a result, any input they provide will be that much more valuable because of the urgency of having to really go deep in their analysis of what is going on.
The onlooker has a lot more to draw on when weighing-in on what would naturally only be the general issues faced by people in a relationship, because otherwise only the parties involved are privy to some of the finest details which perhaps alter the dynamics to varying degrees.
We see it referenced quite regularly in popular culture, such as how the Will Smith character in the movie “Hitch” was a real expert in getting people together and helping them sort out their relationship issues, whereas in his own life he struggled quite heavily to provide the same service for himself, so to say. It’s just the way it is… I mean that’s why even some of the greatest professional sportspersons have coaches, many of which coaches have never played the game they’re coaching themselves at the same top-level.
Are relationship experts really single though?
If you look at it from a little bit of a different perspective then you could argue that some of the best relationship experts aren’t in fact necessarily single. For example, I would quite confidently proclaim a legal professional such as a Long Island Divorce Lawyer as a relationship expert and I’d probably be happy to take relationship advice from one long before it reaches the stage where we’re contemplating divorce. These guys have seen and heard it all by way of what constitutes relationship issues, particularly those which lead to the field they’re active in, divorce law.
Now they aren’t necessarily single, are they?